Everyburg Address

Too many months ago our major political parties brought forth upon this nation a campaign to elect the next president of the United States.

We are interminably engaged in this epic battle to determine which candidate is best qualified to attain the highest elective office in the land.

Many candidates in one party have fallen, not having sufficiently enticed a besieged public to their pseudo-patriotic bluster. In the other party, where a modicum of sanity can be detected, three candidates entered the fray, one of whom has bitten the dust.

It is altogether fitting and proper that we see this campaign through to November. But it is questionable whether this nation, conceived on democratic principles, can withstand the battering of those principles by candidates whose standard bearer was our beloved sixteenth president.

Let us pray that somehow the electorate will survive the lies, hypocrisy, racism, xenophobia, and sleazy discourse of those candidates, and that we, now suffering this destructive display, will overcome it, and that this nation — of the people, by the people, and for the people — shall not perish after January 2017.

Feeling the Bern

There is a stirring in the land,
a quaking in the body politic.
Encrusted layers of thought and habit
are cracking and falling off,
and ways long dormant
are rising in voice and action.
The bonds enslaving minds are breaking,
and lies no longer have their grip.
The dawning day is bright with purpose,
a stirring in the land of masses yearning,
a tide of their determination turning.

Where’s the Popcorn?

Got this great idea for a movie.

There’s these two gangsters, Al Dente and Mike Rafone, who are fighting over turf — East Side, West Side, whatever. Their gangs are champing at the bit to take over the other gang’s territory.

Both Al and Mike figure that a gun battle is out, so they try to win over the other gangster’s mob. They each try to make the other one look weak. Al calls Mike “Mini Mike,” and Mike calls Al — who’s huge, by the way — “Pipsqueak Al.” Then Mike tries to embarrass Al by sending out over the Internet a photo of Al’s wife — who used to be a model — posing in the nude on the cover of a dude magazine some year’s back. So Al retaliates by countering with a very unflattering pic of Mike’s wife, drunk at a party.

But it’s a standoff… then…

Well, I haven’t figured out the ending yet, but I’m sure it’ll be a boffo at the box office. Right?